Saying Goodbye to Fear
- Oct 4, 2017
- 3 min read
Every year, one of my favorite traditions is that I choose a word that I want my year to reflect. Last year, I chose love and little did I know that I would meet my now boyfriend during that year. This year, as New Year’s approached, I hadn’t decided what word I wanted. It had a lot to live up to. I considered grace and growth but nothing seemed to fit quite right. Finally, it was New Year’s day and I was sitting at church. I still hadn’t decided my word yet and as I sat in church, the word that the pastor kept repeating was fearless.
F E A R L E S S
I really liked the sounds of that. I wanted to be fearless. I craved the feeling of being free from fear. As our pastor preached, I couldn’t help but focus on that word. As I sat there, I wondered, what did being fearless truly mean?
fear·less
adjective
1. without fear; bold or brave; intrepid.
I wanted to be bold. I wanted to be brave. I wanted to be without fear. I wanted to be fearless.
Ever since I was little, I was worried. Worry and fear were my kryptonite. I was consumed with fear when I was younger. I was worried about everything. My biggest fear was losing the people I loved most. It terrified me and my fear paralyzed me. I finally overcame my fear after some brief counseling but it has still been there and will always be a part of who I am.
Fear is not something I can handle on my own. I need Jesus to be able to help me to control my fear. Even more tangibly then that, I have had different times spent in counseling throughout the past years. Counseling is not a bad or embarrassing thing but it is something I need at different times to remind me of the truths I already know.
So, after choosing my word, I was happy. I was ready to be fearless. I craved fearlessness. I was ready for 2017 to be my year of freedom from fear.
Let me tell you something, 2017 has not been fearless. Not at all. Not even close. 2017 has been filled with fear. I have been struggling more with fear in the past year than I did for most of last few. I’m in a time of my life where things are changing and it’s scary. It’s ironic, I chose fearless to represent my year but instead it should be fearful if it was at all realistic.
I have struggled more with self-doubt and doubting others in this past year than almost ever before. One of my biggest struggles is overthinking things. I overthink everything. Literally, Everything. Because I overthink everything, I become fearful of possibilities that never end up happening. It was always an issue but lately it’s just mushroomed. I want 2017 to be my year where I am finally free from fear.
But it’s hard. Sometimes it’s harder than it ought to be. Why does my brain constantly over think things and doubt? But through it all, I know that my peace and strength comes from Jesus. He alone can make me fearless. He alone can shatter my fears and doubts.
John 14:27 says “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” He alone can make me fearless. He gives me peace. Do not let OUR hearts be troubled. Do not be afraid.
Matthew 6:34 says, “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” This is something I can relate to so much. I get caught up in the idea of all the what-ifs and worries of tomorrow that I end up spending today worrying. That is clearly not what Jesus has called us to do.
Have you ever noticed that the Bible says “do not be afraid,” 365 times. 365 times. Do you doubt that there’s any coincidence that there are 365 days in a year and the Bible says to not be afraid 365 times? That’s amazing.
So, go out today. Do something fearless. Do something that scares you, because you know the peace that Jesus Christ offers.
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